Britney Spears is feverishly dieting before she performs on England’s X-Factor this weekend. Friends say the once portly pop star is going to bed hungry, and dieting so much she’s “suffering from insomnia, anxiety, flushes and shakes.” She is determined not to be known as the dancing cow with the “extra bulk.”

Sigh. This isn’t uber-surprising, is it? When Britney does something she does it. When she’s fat, she’s FAT, when she’s hot, she’s HOT, when she’s nutso, she’s NUTSO. You get the drift. It doesn’t surprise me that she’s living off celery sticks and sleeping on the treadmill before her next performance. Her old tactic— taking a few shots of Jack Beam and popping some Xanax—didn’t work out as well as planned last year at the VMA’s.

Anyway, the Daily Mail caught up with Simon Cowell, a judge on the show, who had this to say about her VMA performance:

If I had been looking after Britney I’d have taken one look at her in rehearsals and I wouldn’t have allowed her on stage. It would have been worth pulling her off the bill – no matter what the cost – to save any chance she had of resurrecting her career. She wasn’t ready for that show in every possible way.”

He also said Brit is welcome to “call him anytime.” That’s a fant-a-bulous idea. I think Brit Brit needs some Simon in her life. A spoon full of Simon helps the reality go down.